Do You Need 99 “Nos” to Get One “Yes”?
If you have ever tried to close a sale, I am sure you have heard this phrase: “It takes a lot of nos to get to a yes.” Looking at that more closely, I wanted a clearer picture of the reality behind the statement. How many nos does it actually take to get a yes from a prospect? And is it still possible to earn a yes after the prospect has already said no?
In the early days of a business there will be many times when you ask for something you want and the answer is no. For most people, that no ends the conversation.
For you, though, a no can open a wide range of opportunities.
Is it possible to turn a “no” into a “yes”?
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1- There are 3 types of NO
Assume you are speaking with the real decision maker, not a gatekeeper who was only sent to “see what you have.” That person can say no for three reasons:
- Wrong information: You did not explain clearly enough why buying from you is a smart decision for the prospect. So now you need to do a better job of explaining.
- Wrong timing: The other person needs time to think and is saying “no” to stop you for now. So now you need patience and should ask for the yes later.
- Wrong context: Something outside their control is blocking them from saying yes. So now you need to work with them to remove that obstacle.
2- Ask questions instead of trying to convince
The saying “never take no for an answer” is often misread as “keep pestering customers until they say yes.” That approach does not work. In fact, it only hardens the no. For example:
You: “I can provide that service for one million dollars a month.”
Client: “No.”
You: “Are you sure? That is not much for what I am offering.”
Client: “I am sure.”
You: “What if I drop it to 500 thousand?”
Client: “Get out of here.”
By contrast, if you stay curious about the no, you can keep the conversation going and discover what it will take to reach a yes, like this:
You: “I can provide the service for 500 thousand dollars a month. How does that sound?”
Client: “No.”
You: “If I understand correctly, you are looking for this type of service, and I know you are familiar with market pricing. Which part of my proposal does not match what you actually need?”
3- Move the conversation forward
Based on the information you gather (by staying curious), move the conversation so it gradually opens the door to a yes. For example, in the scenario above your question may draw any of these three replies:
- Wrong information: In this case, go back to that part of the discussion and clear up the misunderstanding.
Client: “I do not understand how you work remotely.”
You: “I apologize for not explaining that well. Let us walk through that part again and I will make it clearer.” - Wrong timing: In this case, focus the conversation on committing to meet again to discuss the matter.
Client: “I need to think about this for a while.”
You: “I understand. What areas of uncertainty should we clarify before we meet again?” - Wrong circumstance: In this case, suggest a creative approach that removes the block.
Client: “We are already working with a competitor.”
You: “Maybe we should think in terms of a partnership. What can you tell me about them?”
4- Always remember: a “no” means a “yes” is still possible
Most people will not say yes to an idea without saying no first. In fact, several studies show that the average customer says no an average of five times before saying yes. That is because decision making is an emotional process, not an intellectual one.
Most people will do more to avoid pain than to gain pleasure, so the first impulse when someone is asked to decide is to find reasons not to decide. That often shows up as a “no” when what they really mean is “maybe.”
Needless to say, there is much more you can do to turn a no into a yes. You have to approach the conversation so your prospect feels an emotional connection with you and does not feel that you are selling to them:
A good salesperson does not sell anything to the customer; they help the customer buy.
— D. Soitout
In the end, selling is an art. It is the art of listening to understand rather than listening to reply, and it is also the art of reading people: their face, hands, posture and movement, eyes, tone of voice, and more. Learn more about the art of negotiation here.

