Boost Your Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem

Self-esteem and self-confidence do not come naturally to most people. You have to work on them and practice them like any other part of your life and personality. Many of my clients, for example, ask me how I manage to show that energy and confidence when speaking with high-level entrepreneurs, artists, or famous athletes, especially when I was just starting out in the public eye.

I always tell them the same thing. As a kid I was the shortest among my friends, the one who took the longest to grow and mature. But surrounding myself with friends who were bigger, smarter, stronger, and more visionary helped me shift my perspective on the world and on myself. It did not happen overnight. I was shy about public speaking until I was 15 or 16. Now it does not bother me at all. Why? Because I practiced, and I learned to accept that you never stop learning and growing, that you cannot know everything, and that it is okay not to know something.

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1- Start with your personal image

Everything begins with the way you see yourself. It is important that you feel comfortable in your own skin and in your clothes. As one of my partners always says: “we all copy someone we admire.” What that means here is that if you admire someone for their style of dress, it is fine to take ideas from that person. You have to design your image in a way that makes sense for you, something in which you feel at ease.

It is also important to take care of your skin, hair, and all those details. It sounds like a lot of work, but it really is not. If you do it daily, it takes a few minutes in the morning and lasts all day. When you feel good in your body and your clothes, you are one step closer to raising your self-esteem and self-confidence.

2- Leave negativity aside

It is important to accept that not everyone is going to agree with you. Whether in business or in your personal life, it is impossible to please everyone. So do not let negative comments affect you. Instead, focus on the positive, and if someone criticizes you, ignore it unless it is constructive criticism meant to help you improve.

3- Be kind and generous

Being kind to others and generous with yourself, with your time, and with what you have is a powerful way to improve how you see yourself. You act according to the Golden Rule, and you start to feel good about yourself and to believe that you are a good person. It does wonders for your self-confidence, trust me.

4- Increase your skills

How do you increase your skills? By doing more things. And how do you do that? By studying and practicing. Just take small steps at a time. If you want to become a more competent writer, for example, do not try to tackle the entire profession of writing all at once. Start writing more and more every day: journal, blog, write short stories, write freelance pieces. The more you write, the better you will become. Set aside 30 minutes a day to write (for example), and practice will raise your skill as a writer. This applies to any area of your life.

5- Exercise

I repeat this from one article to the next, but it is extremely important. Exercise has been one of my most powerful activities, and it has made me feel much better about myself.

All you have to do is go for a walk a few times a week and you will see the benefits. Start the habit.

6- Get organized

Whether it is your desk, your closet, your house, your car, your calendar, your contacts… organize your life. When you are in control of all the things that waste your time, stress you out, cause delays, or make you fall short on obligations to clients or friends, you will feel more confident in yourself. It seems obvious, but I know very few people, especially in Latin America, who truly have an organized life.

7- Be active

Doing something is almost always better than doing nothing. Of course, doing something could lead to mistakes. But mistakes are part of life. That is how we learn. Without mistakes, we could never improve. So do not worry about that. Just do something, get up, and stay active, physically or mentally, taking steps to achieve something. It can be something you have been procrastinating on, something you never thought you could achieve, and so on.

8- Do more of what you enjoy

It is easy to get lost in the obligations of a job, a client, a family, and so on, but it is important that you learn to say the word NO. When you try to please the world, you forget to please yourself, and that is fatal for your well-being. Start turning down jobs, proposals, and invitations so you can dedicate more time to your well-being and mental health. Enjoy life. We only have one, and it is very short.

9- Do not accept failure and silence the negative voices in your head

Never give up. Never accept failure. There is a solution for everything, so why would you throw in the towel? Make this your new mantra. Succeeding through great adversity is a huge confidence booster.

Low self-confidence is often caused by the negative thoughts that run through our minds on an endless loop. If you are constantly beating yourself up and telling yourself that you are not good enough, not attractive enough, not smart enough or athletic enough, and so on, you are creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. You are becoming what you keep preaching inside your head, and that is not good. The next time you hear that negativity in your head, switch it immediately to a positive affirmation and hold onto it until you reach a real boost in self-confidence.

10- Questioning and introspection

It is important to take time to reflect on yourself. I do it at least once a week. It helps me analyze situations, my reactions, how things turned out, and what I could have said or done better. Always look for ways to improve yourself so you can truly know yourself. If you do not know who you are, other people cannot know either and may form a wrong idea of who you are. It is like the famous saying: “How can you love someone if you do not love yourself?”